satire – the Stentor

Lake Forest College Mock Trial club to take over the Supreme Court

Posted on April 18, 2025April 18, 2025 by Rifah Raida

Rifah Raida ‘28raidar@lakeforest.eduA&E Editor SATIRE–Frustrated with the current state of the judiciary, the Lake Forest College Mock Trial team hastaken matters into their own hands: they’re overthrowing the Supreme Court. Mock Trial at Lake Forest College is a competitive trial advocacy program where students takeon the roles of attorneys and witnesses in simulated civil and criminal cases. Enrollment in thecourse requires participation in the annual regional competition held each February. The teamparticipated in the annual…

New Boomer mascot sparks #NotMyBoomer movement

Posted on April 18, 2025April 18, 2025 by Stentor Staff Writer

Bennett McKinney ‘28mckinneybra@lakeforest.eduStaff Writer SATIRE—On Jan. 3, the college announced a revamped version of its beloved mascot Boomer the Bear. This sudden change was made public in an Instagram post on @lakeforestcollege and @foresterathletics. However, this news was not as well received as the college anticipated it would be. The post was immediately met with backlash from members of the Forester community on Instagram. One commenter wrote “Holy nightmare fuel” while others wondered if this…

WMXM Struggles to Keep Skeletons in Radio Room Closet

Posted on April 18, 2025April 18, 2025 by Jillian Beaster

Jillian Beaster ’28beasterjro@lakeforest.eduNews Editor SATIRE—Stored away in the depths of the WMXM radio room lies a cassette tape marked RaDIoHiVE. A few Executive Board members, DJs and listeners alike have each expressed significant concern upon seeing the tape placed in various places. Some, on the other hand, deny its existence. “First of all, I would like to say that WMXM 88.9 FM is an ethical organization committed to only providing truthful quality, non-subliminal messaging…

Trumplestiltskin and Musty confirm love affair

Posted on April 18, 2025April 18, 2025 by Katelyn O'Callaghan

38 Spellings ‘25 Staff ChefItssatireipromise;)@oceanjungle.edu SATIRE—On Tuesday, April 1, President Orange Trumplestiltskin announced his torrid love affair with tech billionaire Eww Musty. After the New Tork Yimes revealed footage of Musty passionately sucking Trumplestiltskin’s toes, the White House held a press release conference that confirmed the relationship between the two. “I took the ‘T’ out of LGB to make it stand for something new…and that something is me, Trumplestiltskin,” said Trumplestiltskin in the press release. Musty…

Lois, Gregory, McClure, and Roberts Voted Best Dorms on Campus

Posted on April 18, 2025April 18, 2025 by Katelyn O'Callaghan

38 Spellings ‘25 Staff Chefitssatireipromise;)@oceanjungle.edu In a recent survey conducted by Residential Life to assess student satisfaction with dorm living, Lois, Gregory, Roberts, and McClure tied as the top dorms on campus. Freshman Loe Lover, who lived in Lois this academic year, voted it the best dorm due to its lack of air conditioning and airflow throughout the building. “It’s so nice when you walk in during the summer and feel like you stepped into an…

Squirrels take over LFC campus

Posted on April 18, 2025April 18, 2025 by Gaby Planta-Yap

Gabaghool von Plant Yapper ’28 plantayapg@lakeforest.eduFeatures Editor SATIRE—The beginning of the school year started easy enough. Trees were turning over new leaves. Students were settling into their new homes. Squirrels were stealing trash. But, trash would not be the only thing squirrels were stealing. What started as squirrels just plopping themselves around campus or occasionally staring directly into students’ eyes, has turned much more…organized. Starting in mid-September, the janitors of Lillard started to notice strange…

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