Trumplestiltskin and Musty confirm love affair

Trumplestiltskin and Musty confirm love affair

38 Spellings ‘25 Staff ChefItssatireipromise;)@oceanjungle.edu SATIRE—On Tuesday, April 1, President Orange Trumplestiltskin announced his torrid love affair with tech billionaire Eww Musty.  After the New Tork Yimes revealed footage of Musty passionately sucking Trumplestiltskin’s toes, the White House held a press release conference that confirmed the relationship between the two.  “I took the ‘T’ out of LGB to make it stand for something new…and that something is me, Trumplestiltskin,” said Trumplestiltskin in the press release.  Musty…

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Trump signs executive order banning transgender athletes from women’s sports

Trump signs executive order banning transgender athletes from women’s sports

Libby Hearst ’28hearstede@lakeforest.edu JOUR 320 Student When President Donald J. Trump signed an executive order earlier this month banning medically transitioned women from competing in women’s sports, he made a decision that could significantly impact student-athletes in the National Collegiate Athletic Association (NCAA).  The order—”Keeping Men Out of Women’s Sports”—blocks Title IX federal funding for colleges and universities if they allow transgender athletes to compete in women’s sports. Supporters argue the decision protects women’s sports,…

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Op-Ed: DEI Policies at Lake Forest College

Allie Armour ’28armouragr@lakeforest.eduJOUR 320 Student Since returning to office, President Trump and his administration have made it clear that they want to remove diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) programs from institutions such as schools and workplaces. These programs exist to help prevent discrimination and give everyone, especially minorities, a fair opportunity at jobs, education, and opportunities. Eliminating them wouldn’t just be a step backward—it would make things harder for a lot of people who already…

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NEW POLITICS CLUB TO EASE CAMPUS TENSION

NEW POLITICS CLUB TO EASE CAMPUS TENSION

By CYDNEY SALVADOR‘18 FEATURES EDITOR Politics Club, recently officiated by the Gates Center, began one afternoon as Evan Weller ’21, Nick Wheeler ’21, and Alyson Kearschner ’21 discussed their differing views on recent political events. After their discussion, the group brainstormed a club that would facilitate conversations on a tense and troubled campus. The club’s executive board and adviser, Uihlein Assistant Professor of American Politics Evan Oxman, agree on one thing. “Our biggest goal is…

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How to Get Through the Political Part of the Holidays

How to Get Through the Political Part of the Holidays

The holidays are regarded as the most wonderful time of the year. If you haven’t noticed, this year has been absolute shit, so the holidays coming up are also going to be bad. Why is that? Well, let me give you a simple math problem to solve: (The political atmosphere surrounding a reunion with your extended family) + (Donald Trump winning the election) = ___________________________ Now, before you freak out, take a few deep breaths…

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The Candidates: Pros and Cons

The Candidates: Pros and Cons

Election day is upon us! Before you race on over to the polls to conduct the most heart-wrenching and futile vote of your life, it’s important that you weigh the pros and cons of each candidate. Lucky for you, I’m here to share all the juicy factoids that could help you change your support from the worst candidate to the slightly less terrible one! Let’s go!   Donald Trump Pro: His tiny hands make it…

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