It’s 2016, and America is the most progressive society that will ever exist. We have already solved many of the world’s problems, but there is one recurring issue that rears its head every October. I’m talking about the cultural appropriation of ghosts.
Every year we dress up as ghosts and adorn our houses with their images, without thinking once about the struggle ghosts go through.
Ghosts have a rich culture stretching all the way back to right after the first person died. And yet this group has been marginalized and forced into living in remote forests or swamps. Only in recent years have ghosts been able to move into our communities and, even then, only in our most rundown and abandoned houses and amusement parks.
Some of America’s most notorious and deranged villains committed their crimes dressed as ghosts, like Old Man Jinkins. Everyone, including the police, was more than willing to blame ghosts–everyone except for a few meddling kids and their dog.
We contacted several of the world’s most notable ghosts, but almost every report involved with this story was murdered by Bloody Mary, Candyman, Beetlejuice, and the like.
The only interview we were able to get without being brutally murdered was with a friendly ghost named Casper.
In the interview, Casper told us that “many of his friends are children and he does not blame them for the appropriation of his culture.” Rather he believes that the blame falls with the media. “It has become popular in recent years to produce shows about people hunting or busting ghosts,” Casper said.
The issue is that, as the living, we try to understand and relate to the plight of the ghosts and show how progressive we are. Yet, at the same time, we blatantly ignore the fact that we put the people oppressing them on a pedestal.
Yes, I’m referring to that particularly famous group of private citizens who hunted down and illegally imprisoned ghosts who were doing no harm to anyone. These spirits were simply were trying to enjoy the rights we take for granted every day.
Even when the government stepped in to protect these innocent ghosts, the public voiced such an outcry that the government reversed its decision. Instead, our politicians made this group of hate-mongers a government-sanctioned, roving death squad.
It is time for us to move past our simple opinions of ghosts and acknowledge the real problems that they face every day. So this Halloween, my advice to you is to put down that bed sheet with eye holes, and instead dress as a clown. They’re much scarier.
