Lake Forest College Mock Trial club to take over the Supreme Court

Rifah Raida ‘28
raidar@lakeforest.edu
A&E Editor

SATIRE–Frustrated with the current state of the judiciary, the Lake Forest College Mock Trial team has
taken matters into their own hands: they’re overthrowing the Supreme Court.

Mock Trial at Lake Forest College is a competitive trial advocacy program where students take
on the roles of attorneys and witnesses in simulated civil and criminal cases. Enrollment in the
course requires participation in the annual regional competition held each February. The team
participated in the annual regional AMTA this February and while they didn’t return with a
trophy, they did return with something far more valuable—a whole lot of team spirit and
confidence for next year.

The Mock Trial course, which falls both under the Theatre major as well as Politics here at Lake
Forest College, is offered for 0.5 credits a semester or can be taken as an extracurricular club. It
consists of freshmen, sophomores, juniors, seniors and their beloved Professor Stephanie
Caparelli who are all ready to be in a position of more power, somewhere they can make a real
difference.

I asked a few students from Mock Trial to get their thoughts on this historic transition.

Nolen Heinrichs, a freshman, who played the roles of two witnesses on the mock trial team this
year said, “We can’t confirm anything as of yet, but we thought since we did so amazingly at
regionals we may as well take over the highest court in the land.” I asked him to elaborate on the
role he envisioned for himself, to which he responded with, “I’ll probably be just like an
associate justice. I’m gonna dissent all the opinions, though. Oh and I’m gonna put up 300 page
opinions. Actually, I’m gonna write them in Latin.”

Growing increasingly concerned, I turned to Mila Uram, a sophomore and team attorney, for
reassurance. I received the answer, “We figured it (being part of the Supreme Court) would look
good on our resumes if we started ruling in the Supreme Court cases before applying to law
school. Everybody knows you need to really stand out in your applications nowadays.” Sources
confirm that presiding over constitutional law cases before turning 22 is, in fact, a unique
extracurricular.

Professor Caparelli has not confirmed the rumours as of yet, but she has not denied them either,
which we believe is sufficient legal precedent to assume it’s definitely happening.

We are still waiting on a response from the American Mock Trial Association and the United
States Supreme Court, however the Lake Forest College Mock Trial team did confirm they do
not care what either has to say. Moreover, inside sources have said the Supreme Court is deeply
concerned about their job security.